Pouring Your Heart Out!

Bleeding Heart

If you poured your heart out, would they listen to you. If they listened, would they care enough to do something about it?

When you are pouring your heart out, it’s not elegant. It is raw and messy and feels somewhat gooey as well.

It no longer feels like a cathartic experience. Now it feels like a door opened and everything you held dear in your heart bled away in the abyss of nothingness.

You are scared that you would get hurt. Is this relationship doomed?

Why is your problemos overshadowing everything that is neutral or good in your life?

Why is the pain so much more apparent than the comfort?

It won’t always work in relieving your woes, pouring your heart out, that is. My poor heart also feels so heavy sometimes. Mera bichara dil!

It is your issue that you miss them. How sad!

It is not enough to want them!! How sad!

While fucking things up, it is rare to be aware of what you are doing and its consequences, at least for me that is the case. Only in hindsight, can you see what your actions and reactions are doing. But even if you knew, would awareness help any? Would they still not want to talk to you? There shouldn’t be any have-to’s and there is no want-to that is possible right now.

You think they have intentionally reduced the significance of a particular relationship in their life in order to not feel the ugly feelings, to not feel more hurt and pain. Is that their reality now? Avoiding pain? Avoiding the gravity of their emotions? I don’t think they need a guide as much as they needs an emotional release, a cathartic experience of being empty.

You don’t think you have downgraded your personality. You don’t think they are the kind of person that they used to be, and they aren’t sure about who they want to be.